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Swim, Run, Drink: The Beer Gut Triathlon

Categories: Glory Days

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Open category winner Lindsay struggles to summit a flat

Saturday saw the 22nd annual observance of a summer tradition in sporting ambition, an event that has spanned eight states and the nation of Haiti, a grueling crucible of mind, body, and liver: The Beer Gut Triathlon. The brainchild of a prominent human rights lawyer named Brian Concannon, Jr., the BGT is a pointless, stupid affair wherein “athletes” swim roughly 1/5 of a mile, run roughly 3 miles, and then chug exactly four (women’s category) or six (open category) watery beers. Vomiting results in a five minute penalty and an extra beer. An athlete who has consumed her allotment must hold the empty cans upside down over her head for 69 seconds; if anything more than isolated drops comes out, she must pay, again, a one-beer penalty.

The following are photographs from this year's competition, held in Seattle's Lake City neighborhood:

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The athletes engage in pre-event psych-out tactics.

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They're off!

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Baywatch!

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The storming of the beach continues

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This guy's youthful appearance and the resulting speculation that he might be underage earned him the nickname 'Chinese gymnast'.

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Oh boy!

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Open category winner Lindsay suppresses a reversal of the digestive process. "I'm hoping to get a sponsorship from Nike," he says.

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After drinking a penalty beer, BGT athlete Kim celebrates her completion of the event.

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