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Seattle Soccer Fans: Start Your Insane Tirades

Categories: Futbol, Media
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If The Onion's experience is anything like my own, they should be receiving plenty of outraged emails for this one.

Of course you have to love the Onion's nav bar:
Baseball   Football   Basketball   Hockey   Motorsports   Women's Sports/Soccer

Hope Solo Backs Up Her Talk

Categories: Futbol, Olympics

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(Spoiler Alert)

One year ago, goalkeeper Hope Solo, a UW alum, got benched for the US women's World Cup match with Brazil. After the team lost, she criticized the decision and her replacement. "There's no doubt in my mind I would've made those saves," she said. In response, her teammates ostracized her for the next year.

Today, she got another shot--and she backed up her talk. The US played Brazil in the gold medal game and Solo shut them out, emerging, according to press reports, as the star of the game.

Way to go, Hope! You were vilified for a trivial outburst, and on a double standard. As Aimee Mullins, President of the Women's Sports Foundation, put it, "Would we have even batted an eyelash if it was David Beckham?" Sure, publicly calling out your teammates isn't good, but it doesn't warrant a year's social banishment. And damnit, a fearless baller with some fire in her belly is the type of teammate people should want, especially as a last line of defense.

Not Gay

The front page of Yahoo's Fantasy Sports section features this curious caption:

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The Ronaldo-Ronaldinho Conundrum

Categories: Futbol

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Both Brazilian soccer stars. One of them had an infamous run-in with a tranny (Ronaldo, above left); one did not (Ronaldinho, above right). Unfortunately we got them confused in our Best Of issue in this writeup about the Copper Gate, as a reader has helpfully pointed out.

Definitely a lame mistake I should have caught. But what I find hilarious is Steve's comment:

"Disliking soccer is one thing. That's your prerogative as Americans. This is just lazy journalism."

Agreed about the lame mistake, but "disliking soccer"? Ah, he must still be sore about this story, which earned me the enmity of futbol fanatics throughout the city. Of course the story says nothing about disliking soccer. In fact, it says plain as day: "I love soccer." Which I do. But that's not enough for the soccer fanatics, who, I've learned, are about as mindlessly jingoistic as a hard-hat Republican. My sport, right or wrong.

The funniest part is that half the commentators accused me of being a Euro snob, the other half (such as Steve and his ilk), a closed-minded American. Whatever.

Calabro Calling Soccer: How Will He Handle the Streaker?

Categories: Futbol

Great news that Kevin Calabro is going to be calling the play-by-play for Sounders FC. I can't wait to hear him work his voodoo on the beautiful game.

But at the risk of unleashing the insane clown posse of Sounders FC supporters again, I do have to say that I hope Kevin learns enough about the game to know what is genuinely exciting and what is simply crappy soccer. Listening to most of the American broadcasts of soccer games they get all worked up about some long, high cross that no one has a prayer of getting into the goal, just because, well, it's long and high and isn't that the definition of exciting? No matter how lame some striker's first touch is, the announcers are creaming themselves that he's "into the box!!!" Most ridiculous of all was the Mitre Power Shot on ABC's soccer broadcasts, in which they told you the speed of every shot on goal, as if that was some kind of measure of how good a shot it was. They seem to think it's like telling you the speed of a pitcher's throw, when it's more like excitedly reporting the speed of a quarterback's incomplete pass.

What's so refreshing about watching English soccer is the announcers don't fall for any of that nonsense. They get excited by brilliant play, and pour scorn on crappy high, fast, unproductive balls, especially when the players are in the box(!!!). Their sardonic, seen-it-all attitude is brilliantly sent up in this Nike ad (above) from years back.

Bringin' Sexy Back

Categories: Futbol

Seattle MLS fans tell owners who's da boss

Categories: Futbol

Seattle's MLS team announced at noon today that the team will be named the Seattle Sounders FC.

The team's management originally proposed the Seattle Alliance, Seattle FC or the Seattle Republic for a team name. Fans responded that these names were totally lame and a write-in option was added. The write-in option was overwhelmingly selected in favor of the other names, and most of the dark horse entires were along the lines of naming the team the Seattle Sounders after Seattle's current USL soccer team.

The "FC" addition is undoubtedly the team's management attempting to recover from the embarrassment of having all of their names rejected. Get out of our kitchen, Seattle Alliance.

Like Father, Like Duct-Taped Son

Categories: Futbol

Think Packer fans are all awesome? Think again.

Any Given Business

Categories: Futbol

Apparently this one's been on the web for a week or two, but it's worth posting for those who haven't seen it. The announcer gets the call wrong a couple of times, but the ref lets us know what happened. Thanks to Jeff for the link.

Falcon Soccer Legend Asked to Leave

Categories: Futbol

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www.thefalcononline.com

Seattle Pacific (my alma mater) doesn't have one of those fancy pants American football programs, so fall is devoted to rooting for the impressively successful soccer team. It was announced yesterday that Coach Cliff McCrath was asked to leave, 10 victories shy of becoming the winningest soccer coach in NCAA history. He has a long history at the school and says leaving wasn't his idea.

Here's what the student newspaper, The Falcon, knows so far.

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