Scott Woodward asserts his authority by firing...some chick in charge of paraplegic fencing or something. Who cares? Husky football fans who are scratching their heads after the team gets rocked in Tuscon to go 0-5 for the first time in 40 years. Hopefully the Monday morning press conference bears personnel news of a more significant nature.

My dad's a minister, so things like taking the Lord's name in vain were verboten in my house. But to him, the problem wasn't saying things like "Oh my God" -- that was just disrespectful. To actually violate the commandment is to claim the big GM in the sky as your ally in evil-doing or petty earthly pursuits--like sports. Dad's favorite example has always been the giant Touchdown Jesus mural on the Notre Dame library, which lines up perfectly with the goalposts at the stadium.

So after growing up in a house where praying for things like athletic victory was a theological no-no, I can't say I'm all that surprised by what happened after the Cubs pulled this stunt (from the Chicago Tribune):

The Cubs brought a heavy hitter to Wrigley Field on Wednesday afternoon, asking the Rev. James L. Greanias, a Greek Orthodox priest from St. Iakovos Church in Valparaiso, Ind., to spread holy water around the dugout to remove an alleged curse that has hovered over the ballclub since its last World Series appearance in 1945.

If you were to point to a single juncture in time where the University of Washington football program began its downward spiral, you could make a case for when the Huskies hired Rick Neuheisel over longtime Don James assistant and then-Toledo head coach Gary Pinkel nearly a decade ago. We all know what's happened to the Huskies since then, and most of us know what's happened to Pinkel: He's singlehandedly revitalized a long-dormant University of Missouri football program that's now ranked third in the country.

Mizzou recently locked Pinkel in to a lucrative multi-year extension, and rightfully so. But we all know how easy it is to tear up agreements such as those if the coach really has an urge to move on; and pathetic as the program has been for the first part of the 21st Century, the Washington job is still the prestige gig between the two. Not only that, but if Pinkel were to take over the Huskies next year, he'd be given a homecoming king's welcome.

Pinkel's got a good thing going at Mizzou, no doubt, and may nip this sort of talk in the bud as soon as the BCS culminates. But if he doesn't, and UW is able to pursue him, a tacit understanding must be reached: that Pinkel is allowed to use any means necessary to do here what he's done at Missouri. UW isn't Northwestern or Duke, elite academic institutions where success on the football field amounts to gravy (although the Blue Devils are having a pretty damn good year right now, and expect Ty Willingham to end up with the headset on at Northwestern sometime soon). UW is a football school -- think Napoleon Kaufman rolling around campus in a brand-new sports car, without any identifiable means of employment. That's what I mean by any means necessary; these kids deserve some sort of compensation anyway for the millions of dollars they bring into the school's coffers. Don't ask, don't tell, just win.

Back in 2003, both the Cubs and Red Sox were on the brink of making the World Series. But then Steve Bartman and Grady Little happened, and the curse remained intact. The next year, of course, the Red Sox shook the monkey off their back by winning it all, a feat they repeated in 2007.

Of the eight teams in this year's playoff field, but three, in my opinion, have a legitimate chance of winning the World Series, and wouldn't you know, the Cubs and Red Sox are two of them (and Kevin Youkilis should be the AL MVP, whereas the NL race is a two-man tossup between Ryan Howard and Albert Pujols). Here are my round-by-round predictions:

ALDS: Boston over Anaheim (I refuse to call them the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim) in four. Really, it's all about game one; if the Angels win it, my money will shift to their winning in five. But without the benefit of seeing how the first game goes, I'm sticking with Boston. Whoever wins this series will be the AL representative in the World Series. They need to change that stupid rule where the Wild Card winner can't play a team in its own division in the first round.

Tampa Bay over ChiSox in four. Tampa is the best story in baseball this year, despite relatively meager fan support. Chicago miraculously reveresed one of the all-time late season tanks to limp into the playoffs. The Rays and their stellar bullpen will vanquish the more experienced ChiSox on their home field.

NLDS: Cubs over the Dodgers in five. The Cubs will overlook the Dodgers and drop one at home, only to come back and take care of business in the rubber match.

Milwaukee over Philly in five. Two very evenly-matched squads engage in a hyper-competitive series that ends up being decided by the Brewers' Sabathia factor in game five.

By recording a piece-of-shit theme song to help hype their playoff run. It's reminiscent of the Mark Wahlberg-John C. Reilly duets from Boogie Nights.

For those not making the connection between Costner and the Rays, the Durham Bulls are their AAA affiliate.

An offshoot of the uber-popular Lingerie Bowl halftime show that's appeared during Super Bowls past, there's now a fledgling league of extraordinary women who will play tackle football against one another in their underwear. Tryouts for the Seattle team, the Mist, are this Friday at Greenlake, although official league play won't start for another year and games will be played indoors, ala arena football. Then there will be a party on Saturday night at Venom, where the public an meet the lucky 12 in "full uniform" (read: in their undies). Fully-clothed details after the jump. It'll be really interesting to see how this goes over in Seattle.

UW just launched a contest to name the next Husky mascot, what with current mascot Spirit (pictured) about to retire. Previous mascots over the years have been named Frosty, Wasky, Ski, Denali, King Chinook, Regent Denali, Sundodger, King Redoubt and Prince Redoubt. You've got until October 9 to submit your nomination here; the winner will be named at the UCLA game on November 15. Our fave: "Scott Linehan." Oh wait, that's for head coach, not mascot.

If the Dawgs are going to fire Ty Willingham before the end of the season, today'd be the ideal day. When Scott Woodward was promoted from interim to permanent AD a couple weeks ago, I thought the timing not to be coincidental. Woodward was given the stability he needed to do the dirtiest of deeds if need be: fire the head football coach if his Huskies stumbled at home against Stanford to start the year 0-4.

Unless Willingham runs the table, a virtually impossible scenario made all the more impossible with Jake Locker's broken thumb, Willingham will be relieved of his duties at season's end. Which begs the question: Why wait? While it's true that installing an interim helmsman can tear a school's in-season recruiting game plan to shreds, it could be argued that letting a lame duck finish out the year is equally damaging. At least by firing Willingham now, Woodward would be sending a message to recruits that the situation on the football field is intolerable. That's also a pretty important message to send to fans and boosters, as patience on Montlake Boulevard is wearing ultra-thin.

I will say this, however: It'll be intriguing to see how the Huskies do with a more traditional offense now that Ronnie Fouch is behind center. Great an athlete as Locker is, his accuracy as a passer leaves a lot to be desired; seeing Fouch come out and actually hit his receivers in the numbers was quite a sight to behold on Saturday. If he plays respectably and the Dawgs get Locker back by, say, the Apple Cup, wouldn't it be fun to play Locker at tailback? I mean, by that point, what will the team have to lose?

Even before it became public knowledge that Ichiro Suzuki's way less-talented teammates hated him, Buzzer Beater was firmly committed to trading the superstar outfielder. Our logic was that Ichiro, at 34, is about to enter the downslope of his career (he'll be 35 on Oct. 22). Now, it might be a pretty effective downslope, which is why the future Hall-of-Fame outfielder will no doubt still be able to fetch a king's ransom of prospects from the likes of the Yankees. We felt like he should have been traded back in June, and we really feel like the M's should trade him now that they've lost 101 games, marking the franchise's worst season in a quarter century.

Last night, the Mariners lost 6-4 to the Angels, in particularly heartbreaking fashion. J.J. Putz gave up a ninth inning moonshot to Vladimir Guerrero in the top of the ninth to break a 4-4 tie. Let's start there: Putz, whose season has been reminiscent of vintage Bobby Ayala, should either be relieved of his duties as closer now, or should be given a very short leash to start 2009. If he blows, say, three out of his first nine save opportunities, hand the ball over to Josh Fields. Of course, that would require that the M's actually sign their MLB-ready, first-round draft pick, which they've yet to do. Signing Fields, obviously, would be a good place to start the 2009 rebuilding effort.

Remember that word: rebuilding. This is why the M's should trade Ichiro. This is also why they should let 36-year-old Raul Ibanez walk,and it's also why they should trade Adrian Beltre, who has one year remaining on his $12 million per annum contract. Beltre is a divisive creature in Mariner nation, such as it is (last night's attendance was generously announced at 16,939). He's the best defensive third baseman in the game, and yet his offensive output has been very uneven, and certainly not worthy of the gargantuan sum the M's gave him a few years ago after he put up A-Rod-like numbers for one glorious, suspicious, contract year in Chavez Ravine before swifly plummeting back to earth in the batter's box. But yeah, rebuilding -- Beltre is still in his prime age-wise; he should be able to fetch some decent prospects in return.

University of Washington football coach Tyrone Willingham announced that he is suspending the Huskies' season, just one day before the team's game against the favored Stanford Cardinal, so he can fly to "the other Washington" to address the nation's financial crisis. As evidence of his ability to contribute, Willingham cited his service as PTA Finance Committee Chair at his daughters' school.

"I call on Coach Harbaugh to join me in putting team second and country first," said Willingham. "We are truly facing a crisis. Now is not the time to engage in school rivalries."

Willingham added that he would suspend all blocking, passing, running, and tackling, pending Harbaugh's agreement.

"I was under the impression that they had already suspended tackling," said Oklahoma University running back DeMarco Murray.

Reached on the campaign trail, where he was packing heat like the oven door, Democratic Vice Presidential candidate Joe Biden said he disapproved of Willingham's decision. "Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!"

Attempts to question Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin were prevented by the McCain campaign, which has not suspended blocking.

Meanwhile, Harbaugh plans to go ahead with the game, whether the Huskies show up or not. “[Their absence] would not have a significant impact on our game plan,” he explained.

Never mind that I disagree with virtually everything the M's promising young starter has to say here (more on that tomorrow), Ry-Ro can shred, as evidenced by the above photo. (Update: Strangely, this post now directs you to the prolebrity.com homepage. There is evidence of it existing in Google, but alas, it's gone. In short, Ry-Ro's prescription for Mariner success in '09 was to resign Ibanez, keep Beltre, and let the young guys play. Gee, that worked out great this year, didn't it?) (Updated update: Ry-Ro explains why he yanked his post down in a separate post.)

Today, the Times has a piece that looks back fondly on Ty Willingham's tenure at Stanford, with Bay Area observers left puzzled with why he hasn't been able to work his magic here. The piece includes this racially incendiary passage, which takes on a heightened level of complexity when you consider that Paint-Dry Ty is black: "Those kids at Stanford are very bright, very smart, very resilient," says Glenn Dickey, a longtime Bay Area columnist. "They are able to bounce back, and that probably worked well for Willingham at Stanford. Maybe you don't have that at a school like Washington, where you don't have the same kind of kid and where you have to have the coaches do more in the sense that they can't rely on the kids being strong."

One of Willingham's more noted Stanford players echoed similar thoughts in a 2001 newspaper article. "We have a different work ethic," tight end Teyo Johnson — who attended Mariner High for a time — told The San Jose Mercury News in 2001. "There's no need to raise our emotions. We understand his businesslike approach. If coach Willingham was at a school with a bunch of guys with gold teeth and braids, he could do well there, but I'm not sure they would respond to his style."

Rest assured, if the Dawgs lose to Stanford at home on Saturday, Willingham's job choices next year will likely be limited to uber-academic institutions which view sports as a quasi-intramural activity, not a cash cow.

With the clock winding down and the Storm trailing the LA Sparks by 10, point guard Sue Bird kicked her game into high gear--a fade-away, three-point jumper, followed almost immediately by a drive under the basket. At 2 minutes she dropped another field goal, getting the Storm within three. But then she made a mistake, pulling a foul too early and giving Spark Marie Ferdinand-Harris two free shots. Almost as soon as she committed the foul, Bird danced back, hands in the air, praying the refs didn't see.

Tweeeeeet!

Bird didn't yell or dig the ground, she crouched on the court and let out a short laugh. Apparently, trying to single-handedly keep your team in the WNBA playoffs is a kinda funny.

The 64-71 loss to Los Angeles wasn't exactly a surprise. Starter Sheryl Swoopes was supposed to be on the injured list and playing well below her ability. And star Lauren Jackson's ankle surgery left her dressed in black on the bench. Having Jackson out was especially painful.

The only thing the Storm had going for them was their notorious fan base. At 16-1, Seattle had the best regular season home record in the league. The crowd at Key Arena (ridiculously small, c'mon people this was our one shot at a title all year) is always perfectly synced, intensely loud, and a touch crazy.

I took my seat next to Bob Machholz. Wearing black sweats and a green checked flannel and reading Stephen King's Lisey's Story. "My god," I thought. "This must be the first disinterested person ever to attend one of the these games." I figured he made the trip for his daughter Megan, sitting next to him.

Wrong, wrong, wrong. Starting at tip off it was a constant stream of verbal explosions:

"Let's go Storm!"
"Push!"
"What are you calling?!"
"Booooo!"
"Woo, woo, woooo!" (stompstompstompstomp)

Megan, an aspiring point guard starting her freshman year at Mt. Si High School in North Bend, loves watching Bird run the court but kept her cool next to her very excited dad.

"Without Lauren [Jackson] it's going to be hard for us to win," Machholz told me at the half. He was right--too hard. Still, it was an exciting cap to a solid season, which is far more than any other local professional athletes can say.