Fourth of July: This is how we roll

 

 

My head's still spinning from visiting Muckleshoot Reservation's massive fireworks rodeo this past weekend. It was a new experience to be invited to light off mortars and roman candles RIGHT NEXT TO A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS STANDS. Also, the trash talking by vendors impressed me as a novel way to move a product. And to the vendor playing with his Bowie knife? I didn’t take your picture because you scare me, dude. (More photos after the jump.)

 

Welcome to the Wild West. Pass any one of these dozens of vendors by without buying something, and you will get shit yelled at you. “Where you going? Huh? Huh?” There’s a lot of anger in this place.

 

 

 

Yes, that’s a thousand-plus dollars of fireworks in a box. I don’t even know what to do with a thousand-plus dollars of fireworks in a box. But I’m sure buying it will put you on the radar of Homeland Security.

 

 

 

Satisfied customers.

 

 

 

A budding pyromaniac. Her family was having a picnic in the back of their car.

 

 

 

After you buy your fireworks, here’s where you light them off. There’s no real separation between this field of crackles and explosions and the boxes of open fireworks at the stands, and fiery destruction of the Muckleshoot reservation is only one misfired bottlerocket away. But it hasn’t happened yet, so I guess it’s perfectly safe.

 

 

 

This vehicle was puttering around the testing range. Target practice, anyone?

 

 

 

As you can see, there's no age limit to buying fireworks. I hope they don't plan on ramming their cart of explosives into anything.