Blind Taste Test: Oh Sleeper

We get a fuckton of promotional CD's sent to us here at the Weekly. Some are horrible (Hilary Duff), some are awesome (Barcelona). Most are by bands you haven't heard of, hoping—praying—that someone like Brian Barr will give their album a spin on his ancient boom box.

Well, Barr had a lot to do this week prepping for REVERBfest, so I figured I'd go ahead and rip open one of his orange envelopes and review whatever disc was inside. So here I am, reviewing the album "When I Am God" by the Fort Worth, Tex.-based Christian death metal band Oh Sleeper. If Oh Sleeper is God, then God is really pissed off at the world. Or maybe he's just pissed at the state of Texas, which is understandable.

When, not if, Oh Sleeper is appointed to rule the holy kingdom, earth will be bombarded with redundant guitar screeches, hoarse, unintelligible yowls from shaggy-haired Kings of Leon lookalikes, and kids dressed in black who slam dance for Christ at an altar near you. Call it cathartic Christianity, if death metal's your bag. And really, if you're a devout Christian, where an earthly existence is an annoying precursor to a heavenly postscript, it should be. The only thing I can't figure out is why the lead singer sounds so much like Satan, who speaks to me in my dreams.