BOGO Blues

Way back in November, I predicted 1990s “You’re Supposed to Be My Friend” would be the new song advertisers use to sell you crap.

“Hi, Franz Ferdinand? It’s the Clash. Yeah, baby, how you doin’? That’s good, that’s good. Well, baby, let’s get down to the point. I’ve been feelin’ you, and I know you’ve been feelin’ me, so how ’bout tonight we get together. First, I’ll take you out for a sumptuous meal and plentiful libations, then I’m gonna lay you down by the fire and make sweet, sweet love to you all night long. That’s right, there will be a little feedback, and I’m goin’ rub that feedback alllllllllllll over, then I’ll throw in a sweet solo. Recognize it? It’s a lil’ somethin’ I borrowed from the Strokes. Not implyin’ you’ve been around, baby, that ain’t the case. You’re fresh baby, so fresh. . . . ” Nine months later, 1990s’ insatiably catchy single “You’re Supposed to Be My Friend” is born. It goes on to sell beer, cars, and iPods for the next century.

Little did I know it would be adopted by a company whose shoes make your feet smell like a homeless person's underpants after three wearings.