21 Tips to Ensure an Uncommonly Happy Little Trip to the Gorge for Sasquatch! This Weekend

This video is the first in a Weekly series by "Bob Moss."

Long before Sasquatch! became the Memorial Day weekend pastime of choice, legions of young people with free time and few channels were drawn to the comforting purr and mesmerizing wizardry of Bob Ross and his palette. Only Bob could say "Everyone needs a friend" and "It'll be our little secret" in the same hour and sound comforting, not creepy. Long since gone, Ross' words of wisdom are the inspiration for this year's guide to getting to Sasquatch! and the Gorge, courtesy of your friends here at Reverb. Stay calm, be open for anything, wear sunscreen, and God bless.

1. Pack accordingly: Ladies, bring a big, cute bag to hold everything you could possibly need at all times. It should hang comfortably and be able to take heavy-duty damage. You never know if you'll be making it back to your own tent, so it's best to (wink) be prepared. Unless you're rolling backstage, now is not the time for your faux Chanel tote. In either case, also bring a new package of cheap cotton undies, disposable enough to change and throw away as needed. Ma'Chell Duma LaVassar

2. Yes, bring a bobby: You might be in the middle of nowhere, but there's nothing wrong with a nice up-do. Bobby pins serve a variety of functions in emergency situations, and it impresses boys when they need a roach clip and you pull one out of your hair and shake it out all sexy. MDL

3. Skip 90: Take Highway 2/28 if you have the time. It's much more scenic (Leavenworth, various rivers, et al.) than 90, and likely won't be burdened by anywhere near the same amount of traffic. Mike Seely

4. Skip Arby's: Get lunch at Mountain High Hamburgers (2941 W. Sparks Rd., Easton, Wash.) while driving through the pass. You'll see the sign, but you won't see the restaurant/shack. It's off most travelers' radar, but infinitely more appetizing than Burger King. Don't leave without a blackberry milkshake. Chris Kornelis