Reaction to Ashley Graham's Press Release Concerning the Postponement of the Billy Joel-Elton John Concerts

Posted Oct. 30 at 3:07 pm by Mike Seely

Joel & John, in healthier days.

​Ashley Graham just sent out a release that will dampen the autumns of post-menopausal women and queens of a certain age: "Promoter Live Nation and the KeyArena were informed by management today that Elton John has been advised by his doctor to postpone these performances due to a serious case of e-coli bacterial infection and influenza. Organizers of the event are working to establish a new date. All patrons who have purchased tickets for the Face 2 Face concerts on Wednesday, November 4 and Saturday, November 7 at the Key Arena are being asked to hold on to their tickets until more information is available regarding the proposed rescheduled engagement."

To which we replied: "Goodbye Elton John, though we won't be hearing you at all in the fall, we hope you ditch the ecoli. Loneliness is tough, but not as tough as it'll be on the bartender's tip jar at the Fairmount Olympic, when Billy Joel cancels his room. It seems to me you've toured together since Poppy Bush was Prez, never knowing who will headline til after a game of Simon Says. And we would have liked to have heard you, but we'll survive, playing your greatest hits CDs, and wishing Lou Rawls were alive."

Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Morrissey at the Moore

Posted Oct. 6 at 1:52 pm by Mike Seely

​Morrissey wil be playing the Moore on November 29, and tickets go on sale this Saturday. Who else but Ashley Graham could have delivered this news to our inbox? Ms. Graham's press release remarked that the High Priest of Smithdom is "surely in the rudest of creative health." We're not sure what that means, but we love it anyway.

Channeling our innermost 'mo, we offered Ms. Graham the following response to this wonderful news: "Do you have a vacancy for a back scrubber...on Morrissey's tour bus." A boy can dream, can't he?

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Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases and Concert News

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Mark Knopfler at the Moore

Posted Sep. 14 at 11:16 am by Mike Seely

​ Dire Straits founder Mark Knopfler has a new album, Get Lucky, coming out tomorrow. But according to a release that just landed in my inbox from the ever-prolific Ashley Graham, he won't be performing these new tracks, along with countless classics, live until April 8, when he'll be appearing at the Moore. To catch the guitar legend in this intimate a setting should be a real treat, which explains in part my immediate reaction to Graham's release: "Hey la, my boyfriend's back." (To those familiar with Knopfler's oeuvre, that wink at perhaps Knopfler's best-known track should make all the sense in the world.)

Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases and Concert News

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Blink 182, Poison, & Def Leppard at White River

Posted Sep. 9 at 12:07 pm by Mike Seely

​ Ashley Graham just sent out a press release announcing the availability of $10, no-fee tickets to shows featuring Blink 182, Poison, and Def Leppard at White River. Our reaction, which was swiftly sent in reply to Ms. Graham: "Hopefully, when Blink 182 plays, I'll blink — and then be unable to open my eyes for the remainder of their set. And when Def Lepard plays, hopefully I'll go temporarily deaf. And when Poison is about to play, hopefully they'll get food poisoning and have to cancel."

Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases and Concert News

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Regina Spektor at the Paramount

Posted Sep. 8 at 10:44 am by Mike Seely

​ Regina Spektor is playing the Paramount on November 3. From whom did I find this out? Who else: Live Nation uber-publicist Ashley Graham. I have a love-hate relationship with Spektor. Hate it when she gets into cutesy-tootsy syncopated-voice/beat-box mode; love it when she reins herself in and makes use of her jaw-dropping range with stripped-down, piano-only accompaniment. Thankfully, her latest album, Far, is far (ha!) better than its predecessor. And that, folks, is my reaction to Ashley Graham's Regina Spektor press release.

Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases and Concert News

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Jay-Z @ Key Arena

Posted Sep. 4 at 2:09 pm by Erika Hobart

​Ashley Graham is on a roll with the press releases today. Not only did she just inform us that Steely Dan is coming to the Paramount, but that hip-hop mogul Jay-Z will be coming to Key Arena on Saturday, October 17. (Tickets go on sale next Saturday.)

My immediate reaction was to email my colleagues my favorite lines from "Big Pimpin,'" which I enjoy rapping along to with gusto in the privacy of my home or in the car with the windows rolled up.

Me give my heart to a woman
Not for nothing, never happen
I'll be forever mackin!

Obviously, it sounds a lot pimper when he raps it than when I blog it.

Topics: Ashley Graham Press Releases

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Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release: Steely Dan at the Paramount

Posted Sep. 4 at 1:16 pm by Mike Seely

​ Prolific publicist Ashley Graham just sent word that legendary smooth-jazz (in the very best sense of the normally derogatory term) duo Steely Dan will be playing a two-show run at the Paramount on October 12 & 13. At the first show, they will perform the album Aja in its entirety (I really like this "show devoted to album" trend, incidentally), and they will devote the second show to The Royal Scam.

It just so happened that when Graham sent her release, playing in my office was — I shit you not (Kornelis will vouch for me!) — the Dan's 1972 classic, Can't Buy a Thrill. Hence, my reply to Ms. Graham's missive was as follows: "Unbelievable coincidence: I'm listening to Can't Buy a Thrill in my office right now. I've never been a fool to do the Dan's dirty work, Ash. And while they call Alabama the Crimson Tide, you can call me Deacon Mike."

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Alternative Reaction to Ashley Graham Press Release

Posted July 20 at 12:36 pm by Mark Fefer

It's lame enough for Cleese (seen at left with alleged new girlfriend) to attempt irony about his money-grubbing predicament by calling his comedy performances "The Alimony Tour—Year One." It's even lamer when he's ripping-off the previously lame ironic attempts of his colleague.

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Reactions to Ashley Graham Press Releases: Special Stand-Up Comedy Edition

Posted July 20 at 11:50 am by Mike Seely

Live Nation publicist Ashley Graham just sent out a trifecta of press releases within the span of about five minutes, each announcing a Moore Theatre appearance by a well-known stand-up comic. All told, Patton Oswalt (Sept. 18), Jo Koy (Sept. 25), and John Cleese (Nov. 3) will be making a stop at the Moore, a potentially giggly tizzy that elicited the following reaction to Graham's own tizzy of press releasery:

"You're the original queen of comedic publicity, Ms. Graham."

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Reaction to Ashley Graham's Pearl Jam-Ben Harper Press Release

Posted July 15 at 1:31 pm by Mike Seely

Ben Harper will open for Pearl Jam on Sept. 21-22 at KeyArena, we were just informed by — who else? — Ashley Graham.

At which point we replied: "Is PJ playing with the hyper-religious, Marley-meets-folk rock Ben Harper, or Jack Johnson's secular Marley-meets-adult contemporary/backs-up-Toots-in-order-to bolster-street-cred homey Ben Harper? Because there really are two Ben Harpers, and they both sound pretty much the same."

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Reaction to Ashley Graham's Broken Lizard Press Release

Posted July 13 at 10:54 am by Mike Seely

The sketch comedy troupe Broken Lizard has made one awful film (Club Dread), one reasonably enjoyable comedy (Beerfest), and one masterpiece (Super Troopers). They've got another film, The Slammin' Salmon, in the can for release later this year, and are hitting the road to bolster its heat.

This explains the release I just got from Live Nation uber-publicist Ashley Graham announcing Broken Lizard's Nov. 20 show at the Paramount. My reaction, borrowing a line from the aforementioned Troopers: "Hold the spit!"

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Reaction to Ashley Graham's "All-In" Ticket Package Press Release

Posted July 7 at 2:46 pm by Mike Seely

The most prolific publicist in the land, Ashley Graham, just sent out a press release announcing "all-in" ticket packages at Live Nation-owned amphitheaters such as White River. For $29.99, concertgoers purchasing the package for select shows will receive "lawn ticket, parking, all fees, a hot dog and a soda."

Among those select shows is the New Kids-Jesse McCartney tilt, which elicited this response from yours truly: "Jesse McCartney? Oh yeah, like Paul McCartney, only way more talented."

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Reaction to Ashley Graham's Australian Pink Floyd Press Release

Posted July 6 at 10:53 am by Mike Seely

Ultra-prolific LiveNation publicist Ashley Graham just sent out a release announcing an Australian Pink Floyd Show at McCaw Hall on September 14. My reaction: "It'd be a lot cooler if the British Pink Floyd were playing McCaw Hall on September 14."

Moments later, however, Graham slipped into the phone booth and emerged with her indie-rock promoter cape on, sending out a free mp3 from the Pharmacy, which plays the Vera Project Friday and the Comet Saturday. Ah, atonement.

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Reaction to Ashley Graham's Def Leppard/Poison Press Release

Posted June 22 at 11:10 am by Mike Seely

I just returned from a glorious little road trip in the North Cascades to find a veritable present in my inbox: an Ashley Graham Press release announcing a Sept. 12 Def Leppard/Poison team-up at White River.

My reaction: "I'd rather pour some sugar on myself, don a crown of poisonous thorns, and lock myself in a cage with a deaf leopard than attend this show."

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Reactions to Ashley Graham Press Releases: The Mike Seely's on Vacation Edition

Posted June 18 at 11:52 am by Chris Kornelis

Mike Seely, left, on casual Friday.

With Mike Seely out of the office for a few days, I've taken it upon myself to pick up the "Reactions to Ashley Graham Press Releases" beat. Her latest comes from her side project/labor of love, WigPR, and involves local do-gooder Kerry Zettel of See Me River and Das Llamas. He's performing/answering questions tonight at the Can Can as part of Sound Magazine's The Song Show. Get there at 7:30 p.m. for a seat. Zettel goes on at 8:30 p.m. RA Scion's not part of the press release, but he's on the bill.

Sorry I didn't bring the snark that Mike does, but since you're still staring at the picture, does it really matter?

Full press release after the jump.

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