A Taste of Google

I recently had the opportunity to visit the Silicon Valley campus of Google (where an individual with whom I am close is employed). In addition to the many other superlatives that attach to it, Google, as you may know, was recently declared by Fortune magazine to be The Best Company to Work For in America. This title derives primarily from the incredible perks, foremost among them the acres of free gourmet food. I have been hearing envy-inducing descriptions of this food with close-to-irritating frequency for months, courtesy of the person with whom I am close. If there’s one thing I knew I would do when given the opportunity to visit the person with whom I am close’s workplace, it was arrive famished.

But while I would love to say that my visit, when it finally occurred, proved my jealousy unwarranted, and that this place had nothing on Bakeman’s, sadly the opposite was true. The food at Google went so far beyond my expectations, I was practically in tears. The only trouble is, I, like all visitors, was required to sign a non-disclosure agreement before setting foot on the campus. Employees’ journalist-friends are particularly forbidden from reporting on anything they witness when they come for a social visit.

So all I can tell you is this. The REDACTED salad with roasted REDACTED and big wedges of REDACTED smeared with creamy REDACTED in a fresh REDACTED dressing was, honestly, the most delicious plate of salad I’ve eaten in a year. The “toppings” available, and I kid you not, included REDACTED, slices of REDACTED, REDACTED-seasoned fillets of REDACTED, and little REDACTED skewers with all the REDACTED you could want. And, of course, it’s all organic and, at one of the cafes, all grown within 50 miles of the campus. So you’ve got the juiciest, most perfectly ripe REDACTED you’ve ever eaten off a cafeteria tray, the most gorgeous bunches of REDACTED, endless varieties of REDACTED, and plenty of REDACTED if you want to create a kind of REDACTED a la REDACTED. Then you’ve got these nubbins of REDACTED that are (of course) beautifully accompanied with REDACTED. I only wished I had some REDACTED to give it some kick, and of course at that moment out comes this tray of REDACTED dripping with the juices of REDACTED. And of course the supply of REDACTED is endless. What can I say? I was just fucking REDACTED.