Soak It Up: Wayward Coffeehouse
Apothecary: Wayward Coffeehouse, 8570 Greenwood Ave. N.
Time of Entry: 8:30 a.m. Tuesday
Level of Hangover: From alcohol? Zero this time. From staying up far later than I'd intended to? A good 5. I was plenty cranky.
Level of Waitstaff Hangover: The woman behind the counter was a bit surly, but I didn't get the impression it was alcohol induced. Her eyeliner was waaay too straight and even for her to have even been out late.
Prescriptions: I knew from the website that this place was very into organic, and when I saw the menu there was no doubt of it. The coffee is organic. The milk is organic. The pastries are organic. Pretty much assume the menu looks like the victim of a chemical-free drive-by, which I am absolutely not in the mood for with a hangover in tow.
Along with that, I get the feeling the operators of Wayward skip breakfast a lot. The menu was mostly sandwiches, which looked like they'd be good, but none of them looked like something you'd eat for breakfast. Trying to find something I might conceivably order with a hangover, I ended up with chocolate doughnuts. Organic chocolate doughnuts. What's the point?? If you're ordering a doughnut, it follows that you probably aren't overly concerned about what goes in your body at that sitting anyway. Plus, in this case organic=gross. Clearly made with too much oil.
Hair of the Dog: Well, no worries there. I ordered the largest black coffee they sold. Good coffee, once you get used to the slightly odd aftertaste.
Success of the Soak: I left as cranky as ever, despite the infusion of caffeine. I imagine if I'd come in hungover I would have left only marginally less so. First off — there are no pancakes to be found at Wayward. As Lorelai Gilmore of my dearly departed Gilmore Girls tells us, pancakes are hangover food, and if Lorelai Gilmore says it, it must be true. Not only are there no pancakes, there is almost no breakfast, which is surprising considering they open at an ungodly hour (6:30 a.m.). Clearly this place doesn't cater to the morning-after crowd.
From what I was able to see, it might not be such a bad place if I had come later in the day. The food is more lunch-dinner fare anyway, and they offer free wireless, live music on weekends, and a pretty cool atmosphere. They also appear to cater to various groups of "No Way He's Ever Had a Girlfriend" sci-fi [ed note: that's SF] nerds who meet there regularly. Or you could go to throw things at the waitstaff to try and knock that chip off their shoulder.
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